Henrietta Hay's Column

If I may be permitted the outrageous murder of a cliché, you can take the girl out of sports, but you can't take the sports out of the girl. In other words, the body may give up, but the memory lives on.

As the oldest living member - probably - of the Colorado University "C" Club, I thought I would outgrow my interest in various athletic activities, but it didn't happen. As an aging couch potato, however, I am very selective in choosing which sport to follow.

My favorite team these days is that great C. U. Women's basketball team. Today's mail brought the 1994-95 Prospectus from Boulder, telling about their plans for the year. It asks, "Will a third straight Big Eight championship satisfy the Colorado women's basketball team? It's expected. Will the Big Eight Tournament Trophy satisfy them? It's expected. Will a fourth straight invitation to the NCAA Championships and third straight Sweet 16 appearance satisfy them? It's expected."

With all but one starter returning and the National Coach of the Year, Ceal Barry in charge, the Buffs are going to cause a lot of excitement this year in the basketball world. All I have to do is figure out how to get the local TV stations to carry their games.

I also follow the women's basketball team at Mesa State, but I do have trouble with a group of fine women athletes who allow themselves to be called the Lady Mavs.

And then there is baseball. Or there was baseball. The major league strike used up more trees for newsprint than the O. J. Simpson trial. A nation without a World Series? It's been known to happen - once every 90 years.

The last year that did not have a World Series was 1904, when John McGraw refused to let his New York Giants play the winner in what he called "that amateur league." With apologies to Abbott and Costello, Who's on first? Nobody.

It's time to rent A League of Their Own. Again. I've only seen it four times. The last time there were no male baseball players was during World War II and the All America Girls Professional Baseball League was formed. These women proved that they were superb athletes who really could play baseball. Let's form another Women's Baseball League. To replace the guys. It might work. The women are used to working for less money than the men get for the same job.

I gave up on college football years ago when it became more of a business than a game. Maybe when Bill McCartney's 15 year multi-million contract at C. U. expires I'll start watching it again. Meanwhile my friend the Nebraska alum calls me each year to gloat.

Pro football, on the other hand, is good entertainment. Everybody knows that it is show business run for profit, big profit. I am still a faithful Bronco fan, although this year I am having trouble with my Texas grandson the Oiler fan. He keeps making disparaging remarks about the Broncos. I can't imagine why.

I have finally found the ultimate in couch potato athletics. Marge Schott move over. I am now the proud owner of half a football team. For $22.50 I bought half of team 4 in the BS Fantasy Football League, BSFFL for short. To quote from the Prospectus, "This game is one of a little skill and a lotta o' luck."

I am told that the idea of fantasy leagues started with people saying, "Hey, I could pick a better team than that." So they fantasized super teams.

I am known as Sage and my partner is Doc. Between us we couldn't pick a winning Little League team, but with a little help and a lot of luck we did very well. At the draft we managed to snag some top players from the National Football League for our team. We are 1-1 in the standings as I write this. If Moon and Testaverde and Sterling Sharpe will just stay healthy we might make it to the Superbowl, which is more than the Broncos can say.

There is nothing wrong with being a couch potato athlete. In fact, it has some pretty exciting moments.