My Friend the Columnist

Librarians talk to librarians. Teachers talk to teachers. Truck drivers talk to truck drivers on their CB's. Computer programmers talk to computers. But columnists sit in little rooms by themselves and don't have anybody to talk to. That's why they have to read all the columns they can find so they can know what other columnists are talking about.

Columns give a good cross section of what people in general are thinking. Whatever your opinion about just about anything, you can find a columnist to agree with you, or one to snarl at. Newspapers, of course, carry columns, as do most magazines. And thanks to the World Wide Web we have access to lots of newspapers.

Unlike journalists, columnists can express personal opinions -- and we do. We are sort of like talk radio, except that you can't talk back without going to the trouble of writing your own opinion -- and signing your name. And columns run the gamut of political thought, while talk radio is almost purely ultra conservative.

Columns, like the people who write them, come in all shapes. There are those that are mainly political, the social issue ones, the domestic ones, the purely funny ones and those that are all or none of the above.

While there are many excellent male columnists, I have several favorites written by women.

One of them is Maureen Dowd. She covers the Washington scene and takes on all comers. Almost always liberal, she occasionally switches gears. Currently the Administration and all its members are fair game. Last week she took on Dick Cheyenne's influence on Mr. Bush. Referring to Cheyenne's influence and deep voice, she wrote, "How else to explain the vice president's success in creating a parallel universe inside the White House that is shaping the real universe?"

An outstanding Colorado columnist is the Denver Post's Diane Carman. She is a strong feminist and doesn't hesitate to express her anger when she feels it. A recent column discussed the question of "outing" rape victims. It is a journalistic problem as well as a human one, and is very much in the news now because of the Kobe Bryan trial. This is a very important problem for women, and Carman suggests that it should be the choice of the victim, although the choice is often taken away from her.

Anna Quindlen is now a contributing editor of Newsweek, but she still writes a pithy column every other week. She is an Irish Catholic Feminist who wrote last month, "Let’s use the "F" word here. People say it’s inappropriate, offensive, that it puts people off. But it seems to me it’s the best way to begin, when it’s simultaneously devalued and invaluable. The "F" word is not an expletive, but an ideal—one that still has a way to go." Note: the "F" word is Feminism.

Ellen Goodman is a liberal political writer who tackles politics and social issues. She obviously respects the system, but is happy to take pot shots at the people in it. Good columnists have a basic respect for what our republican form of government can and should be. I suspect they are the true political idealists. They're the ones who understand the vision but can't stand what's going on.

Then there is Kathleen Parker. She is a conservative but she slips into a liberal stance now and then. But she is always rational and but I enjoy her writing whatever the subject. And, much to my surprise, I often agree with her

And then there is my very favorite, Molly Ivins who writes for the Ft. Worth Telegram the wittiest, most accurate news columns of anybody.

I talk to these people all the time. They don't know it, of course, but they talk to me, too. So really, columnists do have somebody to talk to -- each other.