Henrietta Hay's Column

We can all breathe easily again. The Colorado Lege has folded its tents and ridden off into the sunset, if I may mix a couple of metaphors and borrow Molly Ivins' somewhat irreverent word for Legislature. Lege watching is a special hobby of mine. I learned it from Molly, who reports on the activities in Texas with much glee and acerbic wit.

According to Ivins, "The Legislature is, among other things, the finest free entertainment in Texas. Better than the zoo. Better than the circus."

In 1994 I started choosing the annual Most Ridiculous Piece of Legislation Award. That first year there were three in contention, the official fish bill, the flag in every classroom bill and the son of veggie bill. Things have been going downhill ever since, and we have not had any quite that exotic.

This year the Lege was faced with two serious issues, the ever-present budget and establishing a welfare program, so they didn't have as much time for micro- managing. Most everyone agrees that it was a good session.

Of course there were light moments. One day Rep. Phil Pankey, R-Littleton, showed up on the floor in shorts and was reprimanded by his Majority Leader, Norma Anderson. So the next day he wore a tuxedo.

And there was the prayer flap. Rabbi Stanley Wagner had been praying in the Senate for 17 years without an objection. But when he delivered his first prayer in the House, he was rebuked by Rep. Mike Salaz, R-Cheraw, for, "trying to wield political influence through his prayer." What the Rabbi was praying for understood human needs, including bodily, emotional, educational and needs related to the arts. Pretty seditious stuff!

Then there was the bill aimed at innocent little six year olds. Current law said that children between the ages of 7 and 16 must attend school. Now six year olds enrolled in the first grade or higher are covered too. Boy, you don't want those little old sixers out in the back yard playing marbles and becoming truants.

But none of these quite deserves the Award, so I guess I'll skip it this year. Maybe next year the Lege will put on a better show.

The legislators did manage rein the Far Right in a little bit. They defeated two anti-abortion bills and an effort to eliminate affirmative action. SB19 by Sen. Charles Duke, R-Monument, near Colorado Springs --where else? --Would have won my Award, but it didn't even get out of committee. It would have required that certain historical documents, such as the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution and Bill of Rights be taught in all schools and that the schools must, "...teach the specified documents in the light most favorable to each document's author." Would that include Washington's slaves and Jefferson's Sally Hemmings? My grateful thanks to the Lege for all of these negative actions.

Actually, the members are maturing, physically anyway. The current Legislators are 15 months older on average than those in the 1995 session; their average age is 50.8 years. There are four more women members than last year, which may explain increasing sanity. The Senate members are three years older than the House members.

There are always a few good quotes. One of my favorites has nothing to do with legislation. Lettering on buttons in the state Capital elevators says, "Help is on the way."

"I'm not very good at counting votes, but when I can't get past one . . . I withdraw the amendment." Rep. Andy McElhany, R-Colorado Springs. Seems logical!

On the pleasures of being a Democrat in a Republican Lege: "Let's all walk around so it looks like a lot of us," Sen. Stan Matsunaka, D-Loveland during a standing vote.

Rep. Tony Grampass, R-Evergreen, commented on strengthening child support enforcement in Colorado. "I should've run away years ago because I'd be a helluva a lot richer man if I hadn't supported my kids."

I think the best entertainment for us political voyeurs in the months to come will be, not in the Legislature, but in the upcoming confrontation between Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell and Rep. Scott McInness. Those of us in "that other party" will be watching with great glee.